Wednesday, 8 February 2012

Misery, X and Melodrama

I have referrer spam. Which is weird, because not a lot of people read this blog anyway.

Looking at my stats, I've seen that there are a couple of people (like 10 or so) finding my blog upon looking for misanthropy - and it's only just hit me that I've never really elaborated on that side of me. I've never really expressed my extreme distaste for anyone but a few people (probably for good reason - would YOU like anyone so damn picky?). Well, maybe that's the wrong thing to say, as in, not completely truthful. I don't hate everyone. It's that I hate a lot of people, and the people I do like, I either worship or simply tolerate. Why the misanthropy? It's simply just an outcome of continual social rejection - not that that's really anyone's fault, especially not at such a young age. But to satisfy the needs of those few who want me to be out and open about misanthropy, to express to you that yes, there is someone like you; I'd say that while intellectually I hold that my misanthropy is just a byproduct - toxic waste if you will - of not fitting in and being an outsider, emotionally I generally feel that my personality is not the problem, OTHER PEOPLE are the problem. Other people, the estnihil homunculus says, are unbelievably boring. Shockingly god damn boring. They talk about the weather, and about sports (you can play sport; how the fuck can you talk about it - "this guy he like moved his leg this way then he kicked powerfully and the ball went towards the keeper and he missed but another guy..."), and most of all, they gossip. They gossip constantly. Guys pretend they don't do it publicly, but they do. Everyone does, but a select group of social retards/autists. And there are never enough of these outsiders (interesting people) to form a cohesive group that isn't so damn boring, that bitches so damn much, uncaring as to who is hurt.

The emotional lump of my brain isn't finished yet. Not only are other people boring, they are also not very nice at all. The few that don't judge have been judged so much in their lifetime that they realise how sickening and evil it is. Evolutionarily speaking, it's a good way to rise to a higher social status, and fuck like chimpanzees and make good DNA yadda yadda, but when you actually feel the stares boring into your skin when you do or say something not socially allowed, you feel as if you're being slowly boiled alive for the amusement of everyone around you. Here is the set mould for you. Don't like it? Tough, stay away from everyone, or even better, become a dancing monkey for us. Haha look at that weird guy, he'll do anything. Anything for a bit of recognition as a human being.

Finally, to top off my list of (emotional) reasons why I am misanthropic, people do not like to learn. They aren't stupid, they just have an aversion to everything to do with learning. Guitar, fashion, sports history, how to apply make-up. These are socially acceptable things for you to learn. Everything else can be flushed down the proverbial toilet. If someone enjoys using their brain, isolate them. They are diseased! No one may learn what is not socially acceptable, no one may talk about what is not socially acceptable, no one may do what is not socially acceptable. The vast majority of humans believe they are somehow above animals. Yet the vast majority also behave entirely like animals. Reason for misanthropy #4: most people are hypocrites.

(But again, I probably would come to like people if I happened to fit into the social mould. I don't, hence why I am misanthropic. It's not anyone's fault. No one is to blame. But for those of you looking for something to ease the pain of feeling "I'm the only one!", here's a post just for you. Don't comment saying, "People aren't like that!", because I know I'm probably wrong about most of what I've said here, since my emotional brain hasn't yet caught up to my logical brain. Again, this should serve as a token of support for all those struggling with some degree of misanthropy.)

4 comments:

  1. I hear you there. Funny thing is, I've learned that on the ultra-rare occasion that I do cross paths with one of those individuals I can relate to, I ultimately end up pushing them away. Comes with the territory of knowing the ultimate futility of it all. I don't like attachments because of the pain of loss, and I sure don't want to subject anyone else to that feeling when I finally bite the proverbial bullet and wander off into the sunset. It's a form of self preservation I suppose. We're all jerks, and even though some of us try our hardest not to be, we still fall short.

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  2. "I don't like attachments because of the pain of loss". Gautama Buddha would approve of that.
    "We're all jerks, and even though some of us try our hardest not to be, we still fall short."
    I can't express in words how true that is. Our shared situation reminds me a lot of the Hedgehog's Dilemma, by the way. I guess some of us just have larger quills than others.

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  3. Heh, my IQ is way too low for learning anything, unfortunately ...

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  4. Although a misanthrope, I do really genuinely value my friends, of which I would say I have three authentic ones, as in guys to whom I can say anything that's on my mind (including antinatalism). Living a pretty alienated life in London makes you realise how priceless a compensation friendship is in the general horror of life and I think it's important to acknowledge it. On a wider level, though, I am filled with despair, disgust and loathing for most of what I see around me. I came across this from a blog railing about the state of the UK which included this wonderful tirade:

    "But worst of all, I watched a generation grow up with more information than any other generation had had. A seemingly endless wealth of knowledge that would 'shape the future of our children' and 'elevate them to new standards in the world'.

    All this information... the internet, free media, all of it at the fingertips of millions of people... and all they could come up with was SCAMS. There was no future in information - I watched as millions of people struggled helplessly trying to make a living online - I watched as hundreds of thousands succumbed to the scams and I watched the defeatist attitude take over and this is where we are.

    The UK, a country full of defeatist, empoverished, brutish and simple-minded idiots. People from everywhere around the world in equal measure packed into a country the size of a peanut butter jar - and nobody understands nobody and nobody cares for anyone. There is no solidarity, there is no hope."

    Hear, hear!

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