First of all, I apologise for not looking more thoroughly at the settings for this blog - I hope that at the moment I have rectified the commenting system and that anonymous users will be allowed to post. Sorry to James as well, I got your comment in my email - thanks for it!
I've been reading the works of H.P Lovecraft recently, finding them quite delightfully like Edgar Allan Poe's works, but with this unique, almost terrifying use of the unknown and the unimaginable. But every so often, a passage just sticks out really, that summarises for me so well my mental states: in Celephais it was the man drugging himself in order to spend more time dreaming, in The Call of Cthulhu it was 'The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents', and most of all - I saw yesterday - was the entire first half of The Silver Key. It shocked me to my core to read this; I really had no idea anyone could have put my life down on paper. The dreaming wondrous childhood, the science and logic killing the magic, the struggles to find happiness somewhere else, the boredom inherent in conversation with other people, and eventually the striving to return to my childhood. I cannot recommend this enough for anyone disillusioned with the 'real' world. Do be warned, however, the style is a little archaic - you may want to read more of his works (all free) to develop a taste for it. Don't just think that The Silver Key is the end - although it is certainly, in my opinion, the best in terms of this, by no means is it the last; H.P Lovecraft's works typically have scattered little comments here and there showing the author's deep concerns about the futility of human existence from a universal perspective, the defencelessness of humanity and the strangeness of science beyond our understanding.
As a bonus review, I'd recommend Douglas Adams's books as well for the pleasant, comical misanthropy and world-weariness sometimes inherent in his prose. For example:
'There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.
There is another theory which states that this has already happened.'
Of course there's also the classic statement, I think a very adequate parody of people searching for the 'meaning of life', that "The Answer to the Great Question, of Life, the Universe and Everything" is simply 42. The absurdity of the universe is parodied in an assortment of places, so it's worth it to pick the Hitch Hiker's Guide up at a bookstore if you think you'd like it. Still this is only a 'bonus' review, so I'm not recommending that you read it NOW, QUICKLY and THOROUGHLY. But for an antinatalist in this big gruesome world, it's a nice thing sometimes to hear your voice spoken by another person.